2014 will soon be a memory. Reflecting on the year that is about to end is not an uncommon activity. What were the good, the positive moments? What challenges did I face? Anything I need to do or should do differently in the New Year?
Reflection is a form of introspection which is the ability to examine one’s own thoughts and feelings; a time of contemplation. Introspection/reflection is also a strategy for dealing with change. Think about it. We are soon changing to a new year. And, every year at this time of year, most people do some soul searching, some reflection, some introspection. You’ve been using a change strategy without even realizing it!
For most, the New Year is nothing big. It is something that just happens. For some, it can represent a major or seismic change. If the change to the New Year is unsettling for you, the strategy of introspection is a good one to consider. Let’s explore how introspection or reflection can help us, whether at this time of year or when dealing with any change that brings some type of disruption to your life or comfort zone.
If change has entered your life and you are struggling, redefining, or exploring your role and purpose in the new situation, you may be able to add context or perspective to what is going on. The change can serve as an opportunity to redirect or renew who you are and what you will be in the changed situation. Ask yourself these questions:
AM I REACTING TO THE CHANGE OR AM I DIRECTING THE CHANGE? Change won’t go away, but your attitude and reaction toward it will make all the difference in the world.
WAS I ON THE RIGHT ROAD? We have a way of “walking through life” only to find we’ve taken a “wrong turn” and are on the wrong road. We may have lost what matters to us and are following someone else’s goals. You many need to re-examine your values and priorities and realign them.
Introspection or that serious look at ourselves is not always an easy task. The following techniques may be of help on your journey of self-reflection:
Make self-reflection part of your daily routine. Reviewing and reflecting on what has happened, how whatever happened made you feel, and assessing your response to how you reacted will help you keep things in perspective. And, if self-reflection is part of your routine, when change does happen, reflecting on it will feel more natural.
Remain objective. Objectivity is vital if reflection is going to be useful to you. Truly look at yourself. Ask what happened? How did I react? What could I have done differently or better? What do I still need to do? In our reflection, we may catalog our mistakes and weaknesses along with our successes and strengths. Be careful not to dwell on the mistakes and weaknesses. In reflecting, there is no room for placing blame on self or others. It doesn’t matter what brought about the change. What matters is what you need to do differently to get through and manage what has changed.
Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes. Look at situations and issues from the perspective of others involved. This will help you uncover useful insights that take you beyond the walls of your own experience and may help you come up with ways to better deal with what is going on.
Be open to a variety of thoughts. Remember the wicked queen in Snow White who expected the response, “You are” when she asked, “Mirror, mirror, on the wall. Who’s the fairest of them all?” Self-reflection isn’t about knowing the answers before the question is asked or getting the answer we always want. It is about honestly and constructively assessing ourselves and the situation.
Make a commitment to take action. In your reflection, you will probably come up with ideas on what will work in the changed environment. The next step is to act on those ideas. Develop a plan of action and follow through on it.
Life is a journey. The process of self-reflection or introspection is the GPS on that journey. The process can reaffirm that we are on the right road or it can alert us that we need to “recalculate” where we are headed. You need to pay attention when your introspective GPS tells you to recalculate and do something differently. As you get ready for 2015, do take some time to ask yourself the questions in this post and prepare yourself for the change to the New Year. And, remember, should a life change come your way in the New Year, use reflection and introspection as one of your strategies to help you manage that change. As Carl Sandburg said, “It is necessary…for a man to go away by himself…to sit on a rock…and ask, who am I, where have I been, and where am I going?”
Author Becky Johnen 