AN OASIS OF SERENITY

During a fund drive on my favorite classical music radio station, one donor described the station as her “oasis of serenity.”  Wow, I thought!  How true.  I always feel calm, at peace, and relaxed when listening to classical music.  And, those adjectives certainly are part of an oasis and serenity.  An oasis is a pleasant or peaceful area in the midst of a difficult place or situation.  Serenity is a state of peace amid difficulty; it is being calm, at peace, untroubled.

In these times of “life overload” where every moment of every day can be filled with something to do; where we’re connected 24/7; where our technology (iPhones, iPads, Smartphones, computers, etc.) seems to be an extension of our hands; where our attention is drawn to every ding, ping, or sound of that technology, we all need an oasis of serenity to help us slow down a bit, to help us “refuel” on those busy days, to help us find ourselves when we got lost in the busyness, or to find perspective when we are overwhelmed.

An oasis of serenity may also help us let go of our stresses and worries.  I am reminded of a story about a psychologist who walked around a room while conducting a stress management seminar.  As she raised a glass of water, everyone expected they’d be asked the “half empty or half full” question.  Instead, with a smile on her face, she inquired, “How heavy is this glass of water?”  Answers ranged from 8 ounces to 20 ounces.  She replied, “The absolute weight doesn’t matter.  It depends on how long I hold it.  If I hold it for a minute, it’s not a problem.  If I hold it for an hour, I’ll have an ache in my arm.  If I hold it for a day, my arm will feel numb and paralyzed.  In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes.  She continued, “The stresses and worries in life are like that glass of water.  Think about them for a while and nothing happens. Think about them a bit longer and they begin to hurt.  And if you think about them all day long, you will feel paralyzed – incapable of doing anything.  Remember to put the glass down.”

So to help us put “down the glass with our stresses and worries,”  slow down, refuel, find ourselves or find perspective, let’s focus this week on some ways we can create our own oases of serenity.  These are in no particular order and one or more than one can be used as our lives dictate.

SCHEDULE “ME” TIME. Make an appointment (just as ones for doctors or meetings are made) with ourselves.  Thirty minutes is ideal, but even five minutes can work wonders.  In this time, we need to do something that brings a smile to our face and brings calm and relaxation into our midst.

HAVE PERSONAL PEACE CONFERENCES.  These conferences give us time to reconnect with ourselves, assess what is going on around us, and determine how to proceed with things.  There should be no technology present at these conferences.  Enjoy the peace and quiet.

RECHARGE WITH SOME FRESH AIR.  The atmosphere outside the four walls of our offices and homes provides a refreshing change of pace that recharges our minds and our spirits.  Take in the smells, the sounds, the sights and allow them to refresh and invigorate us.

SMILE.  Smiling is an expression that denotes pleasure, happiness, or joy.  Smiles allow us to feel the bright side of life and feel and think in a more positive way.  And, when we feel positive or happy or joyful, we are more likely to be serene and peaceful.

LISTEN TO OUR INNER VOICE.  Jonathan Lockwood Huie (author and “philosopher of happiness”) tells us, “Your inner voice always knows what to do, but it is a quiet voice.  You can only hear the whisperings of your inner voice – your inner compass – when you turn down the volume of your fears, your regrets, your resentments, and the fear-based advice your neighbors are so willing to give you.”  Our inner voice is a short cut to serenity but we need to listen for it and heed its advice.

CHECK IN WITH OUR POSITIVE “POSSE.”  Surrounding ourselves with encouraging and positive people helps keep energy vampires from stealing our peace of mind, our serenity.

FORGIVE.  When we let go of and move beyond old hurts, resentments, memories, and anger we give ourselves the gift of peace.  Forgiving ourselves and others is very empowering and freeing.  Forgiveness opens space for serenity to take hold and blossom.

CREATE A BLESSINGS OR GRATITUDE LIST.  Looking at our lives through a lens of gratitude makes the good seem even better, the not-so-good look good, and makes us more appreciative of things and helps us focus on the positive.   When we are in a positive frame of mind, we tend to have a sense of tranquility, calm, and peace (all of which help with our serenity).

POWER NAP.  Being well rested helps us find serenity.  During a busy day when energy lags, refresh the mind, body and spirit with a quick power nap. Twenty minutes is ideal but even five minutes can do wonders for us.

PRACTICE ACCEPTANCE.  Spiritual teacher Eckhart Tolle advises, “Whatever the present moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it.”  Acceptance means recognizing and understanding our current situation and what we can and cannot change within it.   When we are able to do this, it releases much stress from us and allows us to move forward in a calmer manner.

DO A RANDOM ACT OF KINDNESS.  Being kind to others makes us feel good about ourselves.  Feeling good about ourselves leads to an inner peace.  That inner peace provides an oasis of serenity for us.

CREATE SERENITY SPACE IN YOUR HOME /YARD.  We can physically create spaces of serenity in our homes, inside and out.  Inside, it can be as simple as decluttering (whether it is the entire house, one room, one flat surface, our desk).  Why declutter?  Because it is hard to relax when there we are inundated with too much “stuff.”  We can also create spaces that give us peace and serenity by the colors we choose, how we design the layout of furniture, and how we accessorize.  Outside, we can have “serenity gardens” or places of quiet and solitude that help us maintain a sense of calm.

It is up to us to bring peace into the moments of chaos in our lives.  We all have the capability to do so.  We all have the capability of creating our own oasis of serenity in the midst of our busyness. We just need to take the time to do so.  It doesn’t have to be complex; it can be very simple.  No excuses.  Take one of the suggestions for a “test drive” this week and see what happens.