SPREAD GOOD VIBES

 

While walking through a retail store, I noticed a t-shirt whose message was “spread good vibes.”  What is it this message is actually asking us to spread? Yourdictionary.com defines vibes as emotional signals people gives out to those around them with their body language and social interactions.   Good vibes would then be signals that are enjoyable, pleasant, pleasurable, delightful, good, nice, fantastic (you can add other positive words to the list).   Someone spreading good vibes would most likely have a smile on their face, a pleasant disposition, and tend to see the positive in everything and everyone.

In an article titled “Good Vibes Only – What Does It Mean?” posted on the Bon Vita website, author Vex King tells us, “Most understand vibes as feelings, or primarily energy, and those who understand it a little deeper will link it to vibration, as everything around us is made up of vibrating energy.  We are all transmitters and receivers of vibrational frequencies. The vibrations we put out are ALWAYS pulling in stuff that’s vibrating at a similar frequency to us. Negative emotions vibrate at a lower pitch, while positive feelings such as joy and appreciation vibrate at the highest pitch of all. Whatever frequency we emit, the same or similar frequency is drawn to us. If you send out good vibes to the Universe – say for example, feelings of joy, then the Universe will give you back more things to feel joyful about.”

What signals do you emit? The chart below represents the Abraham-Hicks Emotional Scale. Use it to determine what vibes you most frequently emit. How about those around you? What vibes emanate from them? Obviously, if you or those around you tend to radiate good vibes then it is easier to deal with whatever comes your way (especially unwanted or unexpected change). Why is this you ask? Well, when we tend to focus on the positive (refer to the top three levels in the chart) it is easier to find the message, the good, the lesson within whatever we are facing. We don’t look for excuses as to why something happened. We don’t blame. We don’t do the “oh, woe is me” routine. Conversely, those who emanate negative vibes seem to wallow in the grief, fear, or anger (refer to the bottom three levels on the chart). Commonly heard might be: This is X’s fault. Why did this happen to me? Not again!

Notice on the chart that the positive vibes/feelings/emotions are at the top which gives them a higher status and more power, more energy. Those at the bottom, the more negative vibes/feelings/emotions are given a lower status and weaker energy.   As Vex King said in the quote in the second paragraph, “If you send out good vibes to the Universe – say for example, feelings of joy, then the Universe will give you back more things to feel joyful about.” This works because the higher we are on the chart, the stronger our energy/power to get or make happen what we want. Likewise, the lower we are on the chart the weaker our energy/power to make happen what we want which can lead to getting stuff we don’t welcome or want.

So, let’s focus on some things we can do to remain positive so we can spread and receive good vibes. ACKNOWLEDGE YOUR STARTING POINT ON THE EMOTIONAL SCALE CHART. Don’t freak out if your starting point is on one of the lower levels. That is OK. It just means that you will have to work a little longer to reach a state of positiveness. There may be solid reasons why you are on one of the lower levels. Review what happened or is happening to make you feel the way you do. Give yourself permission to feel the emotion or to project the blame. Allow yourself to slowly get rid of the negative emotion/energy. Begin to work your way up the chart. If your starting point is on one of the upper levels, wonderful. Continue to do whatever you are doing to remain there.

VISIT WITH YOUR INNER CHILD. Our inner child is the part of us that takes us back to a time when: we were free spirits; our imaginations would run wild; we were creative beyond reason; our days were filled with laugher, fun, joy, and play; we were wildly happy about anything and everything; when cardboard boxes became houses, cars, airplanes or caves; curiosity drove a lot of what we did; we weren’t afraid to take a risk or make a mistake; we bounced back from any type of daily disruption; we lived in the moment.

LIVE IN THE MOMENT. Be present now. Let the past go for a moment and don’t think about the future for a moment. Get into what is happening here and now.

MEDITATE.  Meditation is a practice of concentrated focus (usually upon a sound, object, visualization, the breath, or movement) designed to increase awareness of the present moment as well as reduce stress, promote relaxation, and enrich personal and spiritual growth.  People who meditate are more likely to be filled with positive emotions such as joy, peace, and happiness.

ACCENTUATE THE POSITIVE; ELIMINATE THE NEGATIVE.  Do your best to start each day on a positive note. Tell yourself that this is going to be a great day!  Take everything in stride.  Look for the positive in all that is going on.  Smile.  Laugh. Try to eliminate as many negatives from thoughts, words, and actions as possible.  Try banning words such as no, I don’t like, I can’t, but…

AVOID DRAMA QUEENS AND ENERGY VAMPIRES. If you want to be more positive, you need to surround yourself with people who brighten your day. Those that are negative or those that make “mountains out of mole hills” will just drain you. The more positive energy around you, the more relaxed and easy going you’ll be. As Gandhi said, “Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.”

 

  

FOCUS ON WHAT IS TRULY IMPORTANT. Make a list of all the things that are most meaningful, most important to you. Begin to let go of “stuff” in your life that doesn’t make the list; this is the “stuff” that interferes with you being positive.

GET YOUR GIGGLE GOING. There are many physical and mental health benefits as well as social benefits to laughing.   Among other things, laughter decreases loneliness, anger, and depression, all things that get in the way of being positive.   Laughter adds joy and zest to life, relieves stress, improves mood, and enhances resilience. All of these are factors in being more positive.

CONNECT WITH TOUCHSTONES. Friends and family are a good source of emotional boosts which can help you maintain good vibes. So, stay in contact in whatever way works for you – phone, text, email, Facebook or other social media sites, personal visits.

VOLUNTEER. Volunteering your time and talents is a great way to make you feel good about yourself. Volunteering connects you to others, giving you the opportunity to make new friends and increase your social skills. Spending time helping people is good for your body, mind, and soul.

Since we attract the energy we give off, for us to truly enjoy life we need to think positively and do our part to spread good vibes. The late Yogi Bhajan ( a yogi, spiritual teacher, and entrepreneur) said, “May yourself so happy so that when others look at you they become happy too.” Let this be our goal for the coming week. Let’s make ourselves so happy, so good at spreading good vibes that those whom we encounter “catch” those vibes and happiness. Let’s all do our part in our small section of the world to spread as many good vibes as possible.

NICE AND EASY DOES IT!

The past two weeks, we’ve explored change from the standpoint of making adaptations and transformations to negotiate the changed environment. This week, I want to focus on the approach or attitude of easy going as a useful change strategy.

Abraham Lincoln is credited with the following observation: most people for most of the time can choose how happy or stressed, how relaxed or troubled, how bright or dull their outlook will be. In dealing with change, a choice that will help us be productive and effective in our ability to negotiate the change is to be easy going. This means we are: relaxed, happy, calm, not rigid, not demanding nor stressful. How nice it would be to have 365 days where our lifestyle has a sense of calmness and serenity 24/7. While an admirable goal, it is probably unrealistic to think we can have 365 days, 24/7 of peace and serenity, especially when change happens. Problems, frustrations, anxieties, fears, etc. all get in the way. However, if you tap into being more easy going, into taking time to relax, you can come close to having peaceful, calm, serene days or days where the majority of time/moments are peaceful, calm, or serene.

When you are relaxed, when you make it a priority to be easy going, you are content and have an inner peace; a feeling of satisfaction and happiness with what is going on in your life, even the changes. This is so important when dealing with change, especially unexpected change. When our world gets rocked to its core, when the shift out of our comfort zone is a gigantic one, our first reaction may be one of worry. How am I going to deal with this? I just can’t go on! Why did this happen? While normal, this type of reaction doesn’t help deal with the change. This type of reaction is good for raising your stress level and if that can be avoided, all the better for you.

A better reaction is to keep things in perspective and look for the positive in the change. This will help relax you and help you become more easy going. So, what can you do to live a more relaxed lifestyle day in and day out? How can you be more easy going?

Don’t worry, be happy. Follow the advice in Bobby McFerrin’s song, Don’t Worry, Be Happy. In life there are many things to get us down.   Going down with them makes it very hard to come back up. Instead of worrying about all the stresses in your life, deal with them. Don’t them let get to you.   Maintain a positive attitude. Unclutter your mind. Rid your mind of worries, fears, and guilt.

Focus on what is truly important. Make a list of all the things that are most meaningful, most important to you. Begin to let go of “stuff” in your life that doesn’t make the list; this is the “stuff” that interferes with you being easy going.

Be an historian. Historians study the past to learn from it. It should be the same with you. Avoid dwelling on things that happened in the past. If mistakes were made, learn from them. You will be able to be more relaxed, more easy going if you aren’t fearing making a mistake.

Get organized. The more clutter in your life, the more stressed and unrelaxed you will be. Declutter. Get rid of stuff you no longer use. Organize what is left. Adopt ‘everything in its place and a place for everything’ as your motto.

Avoid energy vampires and drama queens. If you want to be relaxed and easy going, you need to surround yourself with people who brighten your day. Those that are negative or those that make “mountains out of mole hills” will just drain you. The more positive energy around you, the more relaxed and easy going you’ll be. As Gandhi said, “Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.”

Make every moment of every day count. Time is too important to waste. Streamline your life by finding efficient ways of doing things. Simplify your lifestyle if needed. Take stock of the number of things in which you are involved and the ‘rate of return’ on each. You might need to eliminate those whose ‘yield’ is low.  
Get your giggle going. There are many physical and mental health benefits as well as social benefits to laughing.   Among other things, laughter decreases loneliness, anger, and depression, all things that get in the way of being relaxed and easy going.   Laughter adds joy and zest to life, relieves stress, improves mood, and enhances resilience. All of these are factors in being more relaxed and easy going.

Take a break! Once in a while, you need to make time for you. When you start to feel stressed, take a short break and relax. Practice stress reduction and relaxation techniques. Meditate. Foster inner peace.

Adopt an attitude of gratitude. We often take the wonderful things in our life for granted. Focus on the good, the positive aspects of your life. Make a list. Focusing on the blessings in your life is a great way of helping you stay relaxed.

I started off by saying how nice it would be to have 365 days where our lifestyle has a sense of calmness and serenity 24/7. And, yes, while this is a challenge for all of us, we can move closer to it (especially when change is trying to steal our peace and serenity) if you work at being more easy going and relaxed. Richard Carlson, in the introduction to the book Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff writes, “Whenever we’re dealing with bad news, a difficult person, or a disappointment of some kind, most of us get into certain habits, ways of reacting to life – particularly adversity – that don’t serve us very well. We overreact, blow things out of proportion, hold on too tightly, and focus on the negative aspects of life. When we are immobilized by little things…our (over-) reactions not only make us frustrated but actually get in the way of getting what we want.”   Begin to replace old habits of reaction with new habits of perspective. Implement the techniques introduced here and remember Reinhold Niebuhr’s Serenity Prayer, “God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference.”